Some people get too uptight about Memorial Day.
Anybody who’s ever found themselves in a debate over who or what the day is intended to memorialize recognizes this.
Purists point out that the day is intended to honor “the men and women who died while in military service,” according to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Veterans Day, a more inclusive day in November, is meant to spotlight all those who have served in the U.S. military.
So significant overlap exists between the two holidays, but they aren’t identical. Technically, it would be incorrect to honor on Memorial Day a soldier who passed decades after serving in World War II because he did not die in active service, but correct to honor that same person’s memory on Veterans Day.
But, really, who cares?
And I don’t mean that in a dismissive way toward the great men and women who have given so much to this country through their active participation in the military. Of course I care about them, and I value their commitments and sacrifices, as should every American.
What I mean is, who cares if we cast a wider circle of compassion on Memorial Day than was originally intended?
People who use this weekend in part to decorate graves of family members who never served in the military aren’t “wrong” to do so. They aren’t devaluing in any way the memories of any veterans, living or dead.
And if somebody wants to buy any active-duty soldiers breakfast on Monday, or pay for their groceries, or just nod their head and say “thank you,” there’s nothing wrong with that, either.
They shouldn’t feel they have to wait until Nov. 11, which is the “proper” day to thank living vets.
After all, the meaning of Memorial Day has expanded and changed over the years. It was originally Decoration Day, meant to mark the ultimate sacrifices of Civil War soldiers. And only Union soldiers, at that.
The founder of the day is somewhat in dispute. A commonly floated name is John Alexander Logan, a Union officer who later led a veterans group dedicated to just such recognition. He set May 30, 1868, as the date to decorate soldiers’ graves, according to historian John P. Blair, writing for the National Archives History Office.
But Blair notes other names, as well, including Martha G. Kimball, who wrote to Logan about the custom of grave decoration; Henry Carter Welles and John Boyce Murray, a druggist and county clear, respectively, who pushed for a similar day in New York; and the Ladies Memorial Association in Columbus, Georgia, which pressed for properl burials of Confederate soldiers.
Over the years, as the immediacy of the Civil War receded in Americans’ memories, the annual commemoration grew to include dead soldiers from other American wars. (A sad reality of history is that there are always new wars — and new war dead.)
The modern commemoration of Memorial Day dates back just 52 years, when Congress in 1968 standardized the day as the last Monday in May to give federal employees a long weekend.
This year, of course, will be like no other Memorial Day in history, with parades canceled and in-person observances transitioning online because of coronavirus concerns. Maybe the most feasible way to observe Memorial Day 2020 will be the National Moment of Remembrance at 3 p.m., a chance to step away from other obligations — including work, for many — to reflect on the ultimate price made by many veterans.
Or Americans may elect to do nothing at all, admittedly not a very good look, but still another option paid for in large part by the strength and sacrifice of our brave men and women in uniform.
chris.schillig@yahoo.com
@cschillig on Twitter
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